Answering the Call
By Sarah Powers
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Embracing Silence
When I am about to leave on retreat, inevitably someone says, "Have a good
time!" This comment amuses me, for I know that their idea of a good time is
mostly not what I will be having. When I simply want to let my mind roam and
my body relax, I go to a warm sea with my family and friends. But I have
gone on enough fun vacations to lose the illusion that feeling content has
very much to do with what is going on outside me. When I really want to face
and disempower the habits of discontent that continually resurface no matter
where I am, I go on retreat. While it is not always easy or fun, I have
found that going on meditation retreats and facing myself in silence allows
me to see my fears and attachments more clearly, to embrace them with
compassion, and to grow in intuition and trust of my true nature.
Going on retreat gives us the opportunity to pay attention to three
essential aspects of spiritual practice. First, we learn or revisit the
tools of awareness taught within a particular tradition. These are the
specifics of asana, pranayama, and meditation appropriate for our level of
understanding and application. On retreat, we also have the opportunity to
hear the philosophical teachings that underlie these practices. In a
traditional class or workshop, there just is not the time to delve into
these areas very fully. Second, retreats give us an opportunity to reflect
on these ideas and practices. This contemplation often sparks an
uncompromising and unsentimental yet more truly compassionate view of
ourselves and our lives, which is often a necessary precursor to change.
Third, retreats strengthen practice. On retreat, in the absence of the tasks
and distractions of our everyday lives, we are encouraged not only to
practice more, accelerating our understanding and unfolding, but also to
sustain the lens of mindfulness throughout each day. Once we've spent time
on retreat, living with awareness day after day, we are more likely to catch
ourselves and interrupt the habits of distraction when we return home.
Instead of feeling irritated and restless when we get stuck waiting in a
long line, for example, we may find it easier to turn inward with meditative
awareness, appreciating the unhurried moments. By going on retreat, we get
to practice living in a way that engenders clarity and compassion, the inner
abodes of the awakened.
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